I’m very sorry, Bruno Mars. Somebody lied to you (and my money’s on Satan). Her sex might seem like it’s taking you to paradise, but believe me, it ain’t lettin’ you into heaven at all. See, it is written that the thief – aka: the devil – only comes to do three things: 1)steal, 2)kill, and 3) destroy (John 10:10). He lies, he cheats, and he steals. And when it comes to sexual sin, I happen to have a very stong opinion that he intends to do all of the above. He leads the whole world astray (Revelations 12:9).
God created the act of sex as a way for a married couple to connect and procreate. It allows two people to really become one flesh. It’s quite the fascinating thing, because, as a friend recently put it, it’s probably the only sin that can be turned into something completely supported, if not encouraged, by God. It’s truly a beautiful thing… when in the covenant of marriage. It even says in the Bible that a man and his wife are to submit to each other out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21), which can be taken as far as to assume that means to submit your bodies to one another. It’s also used as a tool to resist temptation outside of your marriage as well (1 Corinthians 7:4-6). Outside of that covenant though, it is considered to be sinful. Paul actually wrote to run from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18). The NLT says, “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.”
So, tell me Bruno, how in the world is sex making you feel like you’ve been locked out of heaven if no other sin affects the body so clearly? (And if you’d like to plead the case that maybe Bruno Mars means his wife, I googled it; he doesn’t have one. Plus, I’m just using the song as an illustration). My answer is because the DEVIL wants you to believe it does bring you closer to this state of joy and bliss that you could feasibly only achieve in heaven.
Obviously, as the unwed mother of a three-year old, I’ve learned this from experience. I’ve had sex before and I can even go as far as to say that I know what it’s like to make love – and I thought for so long that it was bringing me so much closer to my partner. At the time I did not have a relationship with Christ, so I had no clue how far it was taking me from Him, but I never could realize just how much it was tearing apart the relationship I had with the man in front of me.
I believed the lie that sex is the same in and outside of marriage. That the same beautiful connection it was created for could also be created under different circumstances. BUT IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY. God says no, so why is premarital sex just “okay” to do? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you want a good lie, try listening to the devil for a minute. He’s as cunning and deceitful as they come; and though he may paint the sin as brightly and beautiful as he can, you know he’s only there to destroy something.
I look at it like this: imagine an old movie set of a city street. You know the ones where the have the big wooden cut-outs with the building faces painted on them? It looks like a city, but trying walking up to one of the doors; you won’t get in. It’s not a real building. Try peeking in one of the windows; you won’t see a thing. It’s all an illusion. None of it is real. Sure it looks like a city street, but it isn’t a city street. You think you have access to all of these things… but you don’t. Because it isn’t REAL.
Similarly, you might think you’re making, expressing, and sharing love with a man. But you’re not. You’re sinning against your own flesh, and so is he. You might think you’re getting closer, but you’re not. You’re actually going to distance yourselves from each other, because you’re cheapening your relationship by not treasuring and cherishing each others virtue. The only doors you’ll be opening are to insecurity, paranoia, jealousy, and heart-break.
You know, this world is so infected by Satan and his lies that all of our American society pushes that sex can be this fun and wonderful thing and everyone should do it. God so clearly says that we should not, but Satan really wants us to. He's taken one of God's most beautiful and romantic gifts and the greatest connection a person can have, second only to their connection with Christ, and he's twisted it and mangled it into something so perverted that we don't even recognize it for what it's supposed to be anymore. He's made us believe that it's so insignificant that we can do it with someone we just met and never call them again. Now, I've had one-night-stands, and let me tell you – nothing in this world is less satisfying. They get you no where but feeling dirty and regretful. And yet, society makes jokes like it's funny or something. This is what Satan has made out of God's gift of allowing us to become one flesh with another.
Please believe me, please believe the Lord, and learn from my mistakes. Because once you cross that line into the sexual realm, its like opening flood gates; not altogether impossible to close, but mighty difficult. You are worth more than what the devil will make you believe; you are worth the blood of Christ! No matter what lies Satan's told you in the past, you sell a little piece of your heart and your soul to every person you give yourself over to… And that's one less piece of your heart you have to offer to your husband (or wife).
Thankfully, to those of us who have already given in to the temptation and sin, God also has a promise that He can make us new and whole again (Revelations 21:5). Christ even declares that He's come to bind up the brokenhearted (Luke 4:18). Let the Lord have your heart and He will heal it and make it whole again so that you will be able to give yourself and a more complete and unconditional love to your husband or wife.
And those still in a relationship that has crossed that line, it happens to be my personal belief that God can do the same for your relationship. I mean, I can't guarantee you're with the one He's chosen for you, but I believe with Him, all things are possible. He can restore all relationships because He can restore all things.
Believe me, friends. This is not an easy thing to tackle, but you'll be in my prayers. Please keep me in yours as well! And I've posted this before, but if you'd like to share testimony, ask questions, or request prayer, please check out my contact information page or leave a comment below. I'd love to hear what you have to say and would love an opportunity to pray for you personally.
May God bless you!