better than the best day of your life.

The morning of September 6, I literally decided that I was going to find a Psalm and read it. So, I flipped through and seemingly randomly selected Psalm 84. One particular verse stood out, it was Psalm 84:10:
Better is one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;

I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.”

I am so humbled by this scripture, and I’ll never forget the first time I heard it.
It was during worship at a small church I used to visit every so often. Their worship team usually consists of one acoustic guitarist, who also sings, and occasionally a drummer, pianist, or bassist. They have about a dozen or so consistent attendants.
A song was written around this scripture and there’s a point in the song where the words “better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere” just ring out and repeat over and over again.
I just stood there with my arms raised high and sobbing. I was so slain and so overcome by this realization that there was nothing greater in all the world, no greater feeling, no greater honor, no greater blessing than to spend just one day in the courts of the Lord. If I could reach just one day in His presence, it would top any and every moment of joy I’ve experienced and wipe away every ounce of sadness I’ve ever felt. Just one day.
I haven’t soon forgotten the day.
What’s intriguing to me is when it resurfaced.

Again, I hadn’t actually read the phrase in the Bible before. I guess I assumed it was from scripture, but I couldn’t have told you where it came from. September 6, 2013 was an interesting morning for it to be read and dwelling on my heart.
As I sat all day thinking of the fact that I haven’t seen anything of joy yet, and it gets so much better than even the best of moments here once we reach heaven, just pondering the goodness of the Lord and being humbled in all of the above… It all lead up to one of the most exciting moments of my life to date: my love of this life asked me to marry him.

engaged

I can’t explain the sensation of knowing for certain now that this dream is coming true, and the honor I feel knowing that I’ve been blessed enough to soon be his wife. I’ve never been treated so well by a man and loved so unconditionally by another person. He is second only to Christ, and I’m so blessed by his love that is so Christ-like.
To say I’m totally pumped is a complete understatement.

As a girl who has struggled so much with identity in relationships, and walked the line (and sometimes completely crossed it) of idolizing a boyfriend, placing his needs, feelings, and definition of me above, not just mine, but the Lord’s, I find this a very curious “coincidence” that God would so casually remind me that even a thousand of the happiest days here on earth could not compare to one day in heaven, on one of the happiest days of my life.

I am humbled and I am happy here.
God is so good that He doesn’t offer us a lifetime of happiness, but rather, an eternity of joy; and also so good that He allows us to sample a taste of that here, passing on just enough to let us know it is well worth the wait and effort in the pursuit, but not enough to satisfy us completely so that we stop looking up.

If you think this is as good as it can get, just hold on. You haven’t seen anything yet.

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