Author: Sam

As someone who carries the cross of Generalized Anxiety Disorder, I can’t say I'll be “celebrating” or even really observing World Mental Health Day this weekend. Because every day is so heavily influenced by my own mental health, I'm always thinking about it and observing it, therefore, this day feels like every other day. Because… Continue reading World Mental Health Day.

It’s taken me a long time to have the courage to say this, but: I’m done. Peace out, Christianity. I quit. Nothing has eroded my faith quite like the evangelical base of Donald Trump’s supporters. I’m ashamed I was one of you. In the last four (plus) years I’ve watched in horror as the people… Continue reading departure.

Around every September 11, I spend hours sitting before my television watching documentaries about the terrorist attacks on America. Every other day of the year, you'll find me consuming a wide variety of true crime stories, on podcasts, on television, or in books. I get a lot of comments about how heavy that must be,… Continue reading true crime obsessed.

I asked, How can I midwife this sadness? How do I create a life with it? And the night answered: Tell your story. Plant flowers. That’s it. - Tanya Markul I’ve suffered some blows in recent weeks that left me feeling so damn disappointed in humans. I’ve had to wake up and realize that there… Continue reading tell your story. plant flowers. that’s it.

We close on our new house in 3 weeks! And we cannot. wait. Except, we have to. Technically the new house is not yet our home. The soon-to-be old house is our home. It’s hard to feel like it’s really OUR home because so many of the personal touches are already packed. But it still… Continue reading liminal home.

At this point in my life, in the landscape that is 2020, the only thing I want motivating any of my decisions is kindness. The kindness that loves my neighbor as myself. The kindness that lets others know they’re loved. The kindness I would want shown to me. And I’m not going to whine about… Continue reading note: it’s not about the masks.

Scroll through my pics one more time And let that sigh build up And let it down heavy. Remember the days When you didn’t know how To love me. The irony of the matter Is that all I wanted to do was love you. I longed for you, Begged for your attention. Pleasing, worshiping, adoring,… Continue reading gone are the days. | a poem.

About 4 decades ago or more, we’re not exactly sure, my grandma Judy had some prickly pear cacti growing on the side of my mom’s childhood home. She’d propagated them from an even older prickly pear cactus at my great-grandparents home. In the early 80’s, before her death, she gave some prickly babies from her… Continue reading how a 40+ year old plant connects a granddaughter to her mother’s mother.

Yesterday was Mother's Day. I really enjoyed my entire weekend, and was so blessed that both of my babies returned early from their dad's houses to be with me. Their presence was present enough, but I was still treated with a few goodies of appreciation from my kids and partner: My sweet son brought me… Continue reading from the unposted archives: a year after my most disappointing Mother’s Day. 

I saw something earlier today that had me thinking about my Holy Yoga Immersion back in the summer of 2018. The post I saw was about how God met that person there in a life-changing way, and at the time, I didn’t stop to read the whole thing, but now I wish I had. Because… Continue reading God is always bigger.